This past week, a pastor at the church I am attending approached me about a volunteer opportunity. He heard through the grapevine that I enjoy writing, and this opportunity might be a good fit. I’ve been praying about it without really hearing anything from God, so this morning I journaled about it.
My initial reaction is to turn this opportunity down. I listed all the reasons not to do it: I’m not creative. I’m not funny. I don’t want to fail and let anyone down. Then I listed reasons to give it a try: It glorifies God. It would be challenging. It would give me purpose and practice. Basically, my reasons against volunteering focus on my weaknesses and insecurities.
Scripture tells us, though, that God’s power is made perfect in our weakness.
His power is made PERFECT through my weakness.
Ultimately, the purpose is to glorify God by reaching school-aged children. This is definitely a situation where I need to focus on the bigger picture and not my own insecurities.
I really dislike being pushed out of my comfort zone, but God has blessed me every time I have been obedient. I believe and trust He will provide me with words and ideas if I give this volunteer opportunity a try.
For example, I thought it was crazy to sit down and try to write a book, but God has blessed me with more words than I could have come up with on my own. He has opened the door for me to attend a conference and sit down with a publisher. Though this terrifies me because it exploits all of my biggest insecurities (being in a setting where I don’t know anyone, having to engage in small talk, fear of failing, fear of rejection), I know God has been leading me to this and ultimately, I will come home with useful knowledge I don’t have now.
I knew God called us to move to Ohio, but I struggled for months following the move because I didn’t understand why. As always, God is lighting my path. I can’t see the end result, but He is leading me. He is leading me out of my comfort zone and in a direction of immense blessings I can’t even imagine.